Wednesday, 22 June 2011


A very wise friend recently told me, sometimes good things fall apart for great things to come together.

Well right now the good things are definitely falling apart... I am trying to find myself in the middle of my shattered emotions. The fury and betrayal I am feeling are over powering my will to be positive and trying to find joy seems impossible.

I was stabbed in the back yesterday by someone who I considered a friend. Someone I lent my time and hands to, to help them rebuild there home. Someone that I had done no wrong to. Now I have I knife up to the hilt in my back and they just keep twisting it. I can accept what they said but I can't accept what they did. The fact that they said things behind my back and tried to ruin my relationship for no reason, that is unthinkable in my world.

The thing I was accused of was cheating. The reason they had for saying it was that I was texting a guy I met while I was out with my friend at a bar. This guy was already aware that I had a boyfriend and that I had no desire to hook up, get down or do the nasty. He is in fact from another place entirely, like outside of the province. He just happened to be in town on summer  vacation from school. Now because I have talked to someone I am being accused of shit? Am I not allowed to have friends.

Either way, I am feeling hurt and wronged. Apparently this is not an acceptable feeling according to my boyfriend. I should just move on and not care. He and this piece of shit he calls a friend should continue to hangout, and I should just be cool with it like nothing happened. I have yet to receive an apology or anything of the sort. I honestly cannot sit back and think it's ok for them to hang out.

Not to mention I have to deal with Dana calling me grumpy, bitchy, angry, any adjective that describes someone in an unpleasant mood. He is saying I am always like this and is taking an attitude with me every time I get frustrated or upset. Even if it's something minor or something he doesn't like, he spins into a rage and freaks out at me, as if my world isn't stressful enough.

I would honestly, at this point in time, like to take my new shiny knives and chop that stupid asshole piece of shit John Deline into little bitty pieces. Then I would feed him to the snapping turtles and the musky at my cottage.

Now if you'll excuse me, I have a knife to try and remove from my back.

Thursday, 16 June 2011

Summer Time!

Summer has swept into Belleville, leaving a wave of sweat and ice capp's in it's wake. I've been doing a lot of swimming lately and I also have been looking for a job harder than ever!

I found something with a company called Vector however they are starting to annoy me to no end. I have to call in at 9am each morning (waking up the hubby that works late.) and they are scheduling me for training and not giving me the heads up before hand. I want to know how the fuck I am supposed to know to be in the office for training when they don't tell me.

I did get a call from the Brick and one from TAS however neither have panned out just yet. Hopefully I'll hear more in the near future =) All I can do is stay positive and see what happens, right?

Anyways I found out that I have not been crazy all these years... Emu's do in fact growl....

Can you hear it? I'm not totally nuts right?

In other news, I am going to my mom's place for some much needed R&R and some away time from the ins and outs of everyday life in Belleville. Simply put I need to get away. Plus my mom is taking some time off work for a stress leave and doctor has ordered her to de-stress and I think I should be there to help her with it. That way she has someone to help her clean and give her some personal relaxation time. Afterall she has been working in that hell hole of a law office for 10+ years.

I applied at the community advocacy and legal center =) I'm hoping I get the job as junior assistant. It would make life a lot easier. I got turned down by second career unfortunately and that means I have to pay for my education or get OSAP. I think OSAP is the way to go honestly. It means I can get into school possibly as soon as September. That would be a mighty nice birthday gift to me!

Anymawho, cheers!

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Bread Baking Adventures

I have been baking today and trying some new thing... For one I made a breakfast loaf and it turned out alright, not the yummiest bread I've ever had but it was still tasty. It is a sweeter bread made with rolled oat and is much better for you than white bread. I've never been one for oat and whole wheat, but this would be the way to go. You can add in cinnamon, honey, maple syrup or anything else you like. It makes it a wonderfully customizable recipe. It can be used to suit anyone's tastes and would be great as a side dish to your morning coffee and eggs. I'm going to give it another try and make a few adjustments to it. Maybe try honey and cinnamon.

There is your link to the breakfast loaf, enjoy!

Then I made Amish white bread. It actually in the oven right now. The dough itself is a beautiful and silky, not to mention it turns nice and fluffy. My problem is that I put too much of it in the pan and it is getting a little too dark on the top. However it is getting nice and puffy and it apparently tastes very sweet.

I'll update you with progress in a moment, just going to check it.

It turns out that the Amish bread is amazing and the crust didn't harden too much at all. It was absolutely amazing. Very sweet and fluffy. It tastes like and overly sweet white bread, and it's lovely with a little bit of margarine. It was delectable and I will definitely be making it again! Simply a lovely recipe. Apparently it can also be used for cinnamon buns, and THAT is something I will have to try out!

There is a link to the Amish bread

I also made my tradition Italian crusty loaf. A perfect dinner loaf that goes really well with spaghetti and most other dishes. It's also good on its own, with a puffy, soft inside and a golden brown and crunchy exterior. I used this recipe to make sausage buns and hamburger buns. In my high rise building it only takes about 20 minutes to bake and the dough rises in about a 1/2 hour. If you are looking for a really easy recipe to start with, this is it. The dough is silky smooth and is almost a pleasure to work with. A word to the wise, use flour or cornmeal on the bottom to keep the loaf from sticking! It's my new favourite to make and once you taste it, you won't blame me!

Try it... You'll love it.