Changes....

I have decided that change can be a good thing. I haven't felt this happy in months.... probably years.

Maybe I thought I was this happy during that euphoric puppy love phase but really, it was just my brain bonding with another human being. Nothing that is lasting. This is like the happy that people describe to me when they talk about marriage. This only real difference is I love ME and I am happy about my break up.

Dana and I are being civil, which is peculiar although not altogether a bad thing. We are working things out and I'm sure when I am finally packed and ready to go I'll be a little sad, but not because of a lost relationship, but because I am moving onto another part of my life. That is always a little sad, but amazing too.

I was talking to my friend about how I feel is somewhere between the euphoria I felt when I was using drugs and the terror I felt jumping off of the bridge in Campbellford as a teenager. I am rushed and stress and it feels like my world is in shambles, like I'm struggling just to get by and then at the same time like I am feeling an inner serenity that I thought could only come to me with drug use. It's beautiful. I believe I am finally feeling awake, finally breathing, finally alive.

Sleep overs....

First off, you're a pervy-perv-pervster. It's not THAT kinda sleep over. ^.^ I decided since I have my doctors appointment in Trenton anyways, I would come over and help my friends move into there new place.

Barb is lovely by the way... you should meet her. And Cory is hilarious.

I managed to steal some internet (thanks BELL335!) and decided to write you up a little note before I went to bed. Today was not the least bit interesting, but I lived. I am hoping that this stupid headache will screw off shortly, however it's not looking so good for me.

Also, this futon is super comfy as long as I lean to the right.... not to the left, only to the right. Explain that crap.

I am also playing ghost detective for my friends, apparently there is something haunted in this apartment and since I seem to be a touch sensitive to the "paranormal" if you will, I am just going to see what I feel. So far, drafty door behind me and it is all quiet except for my, seemingly thunderous, drumming on the keys. That is until the bag next to me falls over and scares me to death! I am such a tweak sometimes I swear.

I have to say that blogging seems to be doing me well, I feel like I've found out a lot about myself and I will continue to do so the more I write. Anyways, gotta be up suuuuuuuuper early tmrw so I'm going to hit the hay!

Cheers