We meet up in the smoking area, everyone is there... Little Steph is going on about something again, Shawn, well he's eating... Mike, Rob and Chad are playing hack and, oh my God, he's with them. I need to act normal, and say something... I honestly don't know what to say so I manage to sputter out a few words that could be describe at best as "barely cohesive garble." Thankfully, that is pretty much my norm so everyone laughs it off. He wanders over and we talk a bit, everything is so easy. My heart is still thundering out of my chest but I manage to play it cool. We head out to the park to get stoned and hopefully find something interesting to talk about.
I take a hard pull off the bong and my head starts to buzz, the tingle in the back of my throat becomes overwhelming and I cough. Everything is hilarious and funny, I laugh out loud just because it feels nice. I can't imagine my life without this every day. Bryan is still playing hack and Jenna is ripping a bong with Steph. I wander over to the swingset, were I'm eventually joined by Bryan... I can't swing, I'm too high to start feeling like I'm flying right now but he pushes me anyways. Like usual I have nothing coherent to say so I laugh. My head is swimming with what I should do, but nothing seems cool enough. I just keep swinging. Finally, Jenna calls over to me, letting me know we're heading out. I hop down and give Bryan a quick shy smile and we wander over.
Jenna wants to go to the store for munchies, so we head out. I'm fuckin' starving and I can't imagine anything better than food. We grab a bite and sit behind the library, watching the guys play hack. We begin chatting about random shit, who's a pain in the ass and who's hot. That kind of thing. The normal high school drama that we can't imagine anyone over the age of 20 talking about. Jenna asks what I have planned for tonight, and like usual I have nothing. She says she is having some people over to her place and do I want to go. I know at this moment that I should say no and should catch the bus like usual, I have the words on the tip of my tongue and then Bryan chimes in. He says he is going and that we could hang out. With those words my resolve fades and I decide that my dad won't freak that bad. I agree.
After school we head out, it's a good hike to Jennacore's place but we are high as fuck so it doesn't matter. We walk and talk like old friends. Bryan is the coolest guy I've ever met and I can't keep my eyes off him for more than a minute. We chat back and forth like nothing, it's the easiest conversation I've ever had and I'm surprised. He actually gets me, understands the shit I have to say. We get to Jenna's and before I know it I'm on his lap. We kiss again and once more the fireworks are going off in my brain. His lips are incredibly soft and he is surprisingly gentle. We laugh and flirt for a long time. I can't believe he likes me, I'm just some dumb girl that he barely knows. But he does! He does like me! He wants to see me again... My brain feels fuzzy from a combination of weed and happiness. Finally the time comes to face the music and I hate to leave but I have to go... He kisses me goodbye and I head out... I really hope this is the beginning of something good.
Little did I know that this would become the first whirlwind romance I'd ever been in. We were off and on for a long time... We always came back to each other and he was always amazing and wonderful. I loved him the way only a teenager can love. I think that is the purest form of love. Self-less and unconditional. I still have that same love for him but differnt now, he is still in my life and I couldn't be more thankful. We aren't together anymore and I would never go back to it, but he has become the best friend I have. The man who would go to bat for me, back me everytime. He is my protector, my logic and the person who always wants to see me happy. He means more than he will ever fathom to me and he's amazing. I love you Zimzim! <3
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