Today I realized my ex and I are going to be okay.
You know when you have a moment where everything breaks apart and you feel like everything is going to shit? I had one of those moments this morning. I got so frustrated and that turned into stress. When I couldn't process anymore, I broke down and cried. I literally cried uncontrollably for about 45 minutes, including in the car. About 30 minutes in, I started getting severe flashes of anger. I actually punched my ex in the arm and called him all kinds of names. I felt badly and apologized repeatedly in between sobs.
Then later on tonight, we talked. I mean really talked. We both talked, and apologized. We even admitted we didn't hate each other, that it was more of a "two different people" thing. I think we both knew it wasn't going to work out. There is hope for him yet. I was pleased to hear him agree that I wasn't a bad person, and really I don't think he is either.
We even shared a laugh or two over me needing to show him how to change his relationship status and the douche bag that was hitting on me. I firmly believe that one day we can be okay... maybe friends. Who knows.